We've all heard the phrase first impressions matter. If I say 'best behaviour' you probably think about visiting your in-laws or attending an important job interview. Those are moments where you are aware of your reputation being on show, that’s your visible reputation.

We do, however, have an invisible reputation. It's when we have normal daily interactions with friends, family, and work colleagues. They often seem insignificant but what makes your invisible reputation more important than your visible reputation is that it's the authentic, candid version of you.

Sometimes job interviewers ask to speak to an old friend or someone who knows you well. That's so they can get a glimpse at your invisible reputation, the one that actually matters. We all put on somewhat of an act when we head into an important meeting. For instance, I’ve seen people correct their posture, and change their accents or way of speaking all because of first impressions.

Knowing about the invisible reputation is important. It’s your invisible reputation that takes you far in life. Steve Bartlett (Founder of the ‘Diary of a CEO’​ podcast) spoke about invisible reputations in one of his interviews. He said that when he was hiring managers or looking to promote people in his team, it wasn't their credentials or qualifications that made the difference. It was the tiny acts that contributed to their invisible reputation that made the difference. He uses an example of Jennifer in his team and an instance where she ran to the pharmacy to buy a plaster for a worker who had an injury, and that one small act (alongside her qualifications) made the difference in her promotion.

The overarching lesson here is to be aware of how you present yourself outside of the 'best behaviour' situations. How do you treat people when it doesn't make a difference to your job or status?

That's not to say you should start being nice to people for personal gain. You should make good qualities simply for the sake of being a good person, not for personal gain. Anything you achieve because of your reputation is just a bonus.